Divorce is typically not something people plan for when getting married, so when facing a divorce, they may feel lost in the process. Add to that feeling of uncertainty the anger and sadness that often accompanies divorce, and it can be a very difficult process for anyone. In these times, there are steps you can take to help you through the process.

The first piece of divorce advice is to get a therapist. It is understandable that you will feel like w wreck for a while, and family and friends are not always helpful although they may be well-meaning. You need to talk to someone who is objective and trained to help people going through this process. Divorce involves several big life changes; in addition to the ending of a marriage, divorce may mean moving to a new home or not seeing your children every day as you are accustom to.

The second piece of divorce advice is to educate yourself. The divorce process can be complicated one and there are plenty of people that will offer advice or information that may or may not be true. Again, while their intentions may be solid, inaccurate information can only add to the confusion. Even if you are involved in an uncontested divorce, it is important to understand the process and laws that apply to your particular situation.

If there are children involved in the divorce, it is important that their needs are carefully considered throughout the divorce process. Issues like child support and child custody will need to be settled before the divorce is finalized. Sadly, some divorces get ugly and the people involved will use the children in an effort to hurt each other. The best divorce advice you will ever hear is to put the children first.

Regardless of your children’s ages, divorce can be a frustrating and confusing time for them. They may have a difficult time navigated what their new normal will look like, and it is up to the parents to ensure they have all the support and resources they need to get through the divorce emotionally sound.

The advice regarding finding a therapist can apply to the children as well. Having someone to talk to other than their parents will provide children an outlet for any frustration or sadness they may be feeling. Even adult children can benefit from seeking counseling.

Obviously, not all divorces will go smoothly. Particularly when those involved are dealing with the emotional trauma of an affair, abuse, or years of fighting and resentment. When it comes these types of situations, it is best to take care of yourself and your children. You cannot consume yourself with the concerns of your soon-to-be-ex. While it helps to keep a level head and be fair in your approach, you also need to stand your ground on the issues that are most important, which includes being an advocate for your children.

Find a divorce attorney you can trust and listen to their advice. It is important to ask questions and get a full understanding of what will happen prior to it happening. This will help you be mentally prepared during an emotionally trying situation.