It is very common to not know that you need to look for a divorce lawyer until you are served with divorce papers. Unfortunately, if you are caught by surprise after your spouse has already filed for divorce, you don’t have the same opportunity to save up and prepare for you next chapter in life. It also sometimes gives your spouse an unfair leg up while determining child custody and division of assets. The best time to start talking to divorce lawyers is before you ever need one.
Although we hope you’ll never be in a position that you need the help of divorce attorneys to get through a separation, please consider our list of five indications you should meet with a divorce lawyer, below.
Four Signs You Need a Divorce Lawyer
- You need to consider a divorce lawyer if your the financial relationship you and your spouse have abruptly changes.
One of the biggest hangups that people have while going through divorce is division of money, second only to working out custody and child support arrangements (which we will cover later). If your spouse is considering a divorce, they may be preparing for this battle already. If you typically take care of managing all of the bills, they may suddenly want to know how much you pay for the mortgage, the due dates on the car payments, what is on auto-payment, and so on. On the other hand, if your spouse already manages the finances, you should consider it a huge red flag if they suddenly change passwords to bank accounts so that you cannot access it. They may be moving cash into another account (or making payments on a divorce attorney retainer) that they do not want you to know about. If you notice any changes in the way your spouse deals with your finances, you want to be on alert.
- You need to look for a divorce lawyer if your spouse takes an uncharacteristic interest in your children’s day-to-day care.
It is completely normal for the mother and father to equally share responsibilities for caring for their children. However, if one parent has consistently arranged and attended doctor’s appointments, parent-teacher conferences, and the like, and then the other one suddenly tries to usurp the established process, this could be a red flag. If your spouse is considering splitting ways with you, they may be trying to either gain leverage as an active parent that their child custody attorney could use against you in court, or trying to establish a new single-parent relationship with your child or children. It’s a healthy step for them to take if your divorce is inevitable, however, it’s a good time to lawyer up if your spouse is taking these steps.
- You need to interview divorce lawyers if things suddenly change in the bedroom.
One of the most common reasons for divorce is infidelity. If you are a “twice a week” type of couple, and suddenly your spouse isn’t interested in your marital bed, it could be a sign that they are being satisfied elsewhere. If your spouse suddenly bringing new moves to you, it could be a sign that they are picking them up somewhere else. A normal marriage goes through peeks and valleys, sometimes life just gets too busy to keep the fire burning, but if you see an uncharacteristic change in the way that your spouse “does business,” it might be time to talk to Johnny Law.
- You need to think of contacting a lawyer if there is a wall between you and your spouse.
You both develop your own lives. You stop talking. You don’t allow each other to look at the other one’s phones. When you and your spouse start leading lives like roommates instead of a union, you might want to talk to a divorce lawyer. Does that mean you are getting divorced? Absolutely not. But having a consultation to understand what is involved in the separation and how to prepare for it will ensure that you are not robbed in the separation if you lose the game of divorce lawyer chicken with your spouse.
Have you gone through divorce? What was your first sign it was time? Please share with us below.